Men are not exactly known for their ability to display emotions or share them with one another. This includes fathers and their children. However, only when our father's are gone, would the children be faced with multiple 'have beens', had they actually sat and spent time with their old men for a decent conversation.
These are some questions you could ask your fathers today, before it's too late:
1) What are you most proud of in your life?
The default answer could be his family, or you. Or the question could get him to speak about something else that he's personally proud of, that you may not know of. Either way, this is a great question to get your steely old man to open up, and strengthen your father/child relationship through honesty.
2) Who was the most influential person in your life?
It could be his dad, an actor, a former teacher, coach, or even a politician. Whichever way this question goes, the answer will give you an insight into the principles that your father holds dear. It could also let you know what that said person has done or shown that has influenced your father that much in his life.
3) What’s your biggest life lesson?
Post fatherhood, a man's life is almost fully dedicated to providing to his family, and especially his children. This question could elicit a valuable response that you could use for your own children as well. To make the answer flow out easier, ask him about his most precious lesson in a specific life domains, for example marriage, career, raising children, or finances. If your father had told you these lessons when you were a teenager, it would probably feel like a lecture, but to adults, it hits differently as parts of his legacy.
4) What's your biggest regret in life?
This could go two ways - things that regrets doing in life, or NOT doing in life. Either way, it gets your father to open up about his experiences and reflect on his mistakes - something you can take a cue from. For example, if he tells about his regret of not making the trip to a certain place that he had always wanted to go two when he could, maybe you can arrange the trip for him before it's too late. Better still, this question could also give you ideas to add to your own bucket list.
5) What the one thing that I don't know about you?
Most of us idolize our fathers as the 'first superhero' in our lives, but this questions humanizes them. Asking him this may get him to recall the "crazy things" he had done in high school or college - things that you never believed when you were a kid. It is guaranteed to bring a smile to your face, knowing that the stern, yet caring figure that has raised you all these years, has another side that you are just unravelling.
There are many other questions you could also ask your father, such as why he chose his career, or what life event impacted him the most, or even what's the best/worst moment about being a father, but the abobe are just five examples you can get started to get to know your hero more.
So what are you waiting for? Sit your dad down, and start engaging in the conversation now, as only those without fathers would cherish such a moment, however brief it may be.
Don't wait until it's too late.
Source: Fatherly.com
Photo source: Askmen.com
Shuman
Sun Jun 16 2024

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