“Strong women are not those who never face storms, but those who learn to rise every time life tries to break them.”
As the quote denotes, for many women, strength is often defined by the roles they carry - as mothers, professionals, daughters, and caregivers. But sometimes, life places an unimaginable challenge before them, testing not only their physical strength but also their courage, faith, and resilience.
This is the story of Dr Thenmalar Kandasamy, a pathologist specialising in clinical microbiology at Hospital Serdang. Behind her white coat and calm professionalism lies a deeply personal battle that she has fought not once, not twice, but three times.
First diagnosed with cancer in 2007 while she was still a medical student, Dr Thenmalar suddenly found herself on the other side of the hospital bed. The science she had studied helped her understand the disease, but the emotional reality of facing it as a patient was something entirely different.
Over the years, she endured multiple treatments, recurrences, and emotional battles. Yet, through every painful chapter, she continued to pursue her dream of becoming a specialist doctor, while also embracing her most important role – being a mother to her three children, Gangashene, Meerashini, and Dharrshanraj.
Today, as the world celebrates women and their resilience, Dr Thenmalar stands as a powerful reminder that courage is not the absence of fear, but the determination to keep moving forward despite it.
In this special International Women’s Day interview, the thrice cancer survivor reflects on the moment she was first diagnosed, the strength she found within herself and her loved ones, and the lessons life taught her through one of the toughest journeys a person can face.
Recalling the moment she first heard the diagnosis in 2007, Dr Thenmalar describes a mixture of medical awareness and deep personal fear.
“As a medical student, my knowledge told me what to expect, but my heart froze. I understood the science, but as a person I felt fear and uncertainty. In that moment, I realised that knowledge guides us, but courage comes from within,” she said.
That life-changing moment transformed her perspective on medicine and humanity. It made her realise that behind every diagnosis is a person who is frightened, vulnerable, and yet still holding on to hope.
Fighting cancer three times was not just a medical challenge for Dr Thenmalar. It was a deeply personal journey filled with both painful struggles and meaningful milestones.
She says the determination to achieve her ambition of becoming a specialist doctor became one of the biggest motivations that pushed her forward during the darkest moments.
Above all, her children became the reason she refused to give up.
“Being a mother to my three children gave me an unshakable reason to survive and keep fighting,” she shared.
Her husband, Mr Ramnesan, together with her parents Mr Kandasamy and Mrs Alamelu, siblings, friends, and colleagues, also became pillars of strength throughout the difficult journey.
“There were days when I struggled to believe in myself, but their belief in me carried me through,” she said.
Despite undergoing treatments and facing emotional challenges, Dr Thenmalar continued serving patients in the hospital.
“There were days when I wore my lab coat while silently fighting my own battle,” she said.
Professionally, she remained strong and committed to her responsibilities. Personally, she allowed herself moments to heal quietly away from the public eye.
Medicine, she explained, became more than just a career.
“It became therapy and purpose. Even during the most difficult times, it reminded me why I needed to keep going.”
While many people see cancer survivors as symbols of strength, Dr Thenmalar says one of the hardest parts of the journey is the silent emotional battle.
“The fear of recurrence is something many survivors carry quietly,” she explained.
Facing uncertainty, managing treatment side effects, and trying to maintain a sense of normal life can often become an invisible struggle that many around them may not fully understand.
After surviving cancer three times, Dr Thenmalar says her outlook on life has changed profoundly.
She now measures life not by years, but by purpose, gratitude, and the love shared with family.
Ace it.. good days definitely will come 💪💪💪
“Life is not measured by how long we live, but by how present we are and how much love we give,” she said.
In conjunction with International Women’s Day, Dr Thenmalar hopes her story will encourage other women who may be facing similar battles.
“You are stronger than you think. This diagnosis is only one chapter of your story, not the whole book,” she said.
She also reminds women not to neglect their own health while caring for others.
“Your health is not selfish. Early detection, self-care, and listening to your body can save lives.”
If she had to summarise her journey in one sentence, Dr Thenmalar says it would simply be:
“Cancer tested me, but it never defeated me.”
As you share your story, you remind us of the silent strength that so many women possess. Thank you, Dr., for being a voice of courage and healing!
This is an exclusive story by Astro Ulagam. Any reproduction or adaptation requires prior consent from the interviewee to ensure accuracy. If referencing this article, please provide proper credit to Astro Ulagam along with a backlink in recognition of our editorial efforts.
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