Divorce rates are on the rise in Malaysia and indeed it’s a tough topic but understanding it is crucial. We spoke with Revathi Kannan, a leading lawyer, to discuss the increasing divorce cases in Malaysia and how to navigate them legally.

For nearly a decade, Revathi Kannan has handled countless family, and civil litigation matters involving broken marriages, child custody battles, emotional betrayal, and complex divorce proceedings.

Drawing from years of courtroom experience, Revathi shared that while divorce has always existed due to incompatibility and marital dissatisfaction, one issue has become increasingly common in recent years, third-party involvement and affairs.

According to her, emotional and physical cheating has become one of the major contributing factors in many modern divorce cases today.

She explained that with the rise of social media platforms, reunion gatherings, messaging applications, and reconnecting with former partners or friends, opportunities for emotional affairs and inappropriate relationships have become more frequent.

“Divorce is not something new. It has existed for years whenever couples become unhappy in a marriage. But today, third-party involvement is becoming far more common than before,” she shared.

Speaking from her experience handling non-Muslim divorce matters under the Law Reform (Marriage and Divorce) Act 1976, Revathi noted that she stressed that cheating does not only destroy trust between husband and wife but often affects the emotional well-being of children and the entire family structure.

According to her, when one partner becomes emotionally invested in another relationship, it often leads to arguments, emotional neglect, physical abuse, communication breakdowns, or growing emotional distance within the household.

Revathi explained that legally, a spouse who discovers their partner is involved in an affair may file for divorce and include the alleged third party in the petition if sufficient evidence exists.

She shared that if adultery is successfully proven in court, the third party may also be ordered to pay damages to the affected spouse.

Among the forms of evidence commonly presented in court are photographs, hotel reservations, travel records, flight tickets, screenshots of conversations, intimate messages, or proof showing the individuals spending time together in inappropriate circumstances.

However, she cautioned against publicly exposing affairs on social media, saying such actions often create unnecessary humiliation, emotional distress, and long-term damage, especially when children are involved.

“There is no point bringing everything online. If something happens in a marriage, couples should either seek counselling, communicate properly, or pursue legal solutions through the court,” she explained.

On the issue of child custody, Revathi emphasised that the welfare of the child always remains the court’s highest priority.

She explained that while affairs may be considered during custody proceedings, the court ultimately looks at factors such as emotional stability, caregiving ability, financial support, the child’s environment, and overall welfare before making any decision.

For children below seven years old, custody is generally awarded to the mother unless the father can prove that the child’s welfare may be affected under her care.

She also shared that in certain cases; judges may personally speak to children who are mature enough to express their feelings and preferences before determining custody arrangements.

Interestingly, Revathi revealed that some cases involve couples who had been together for over a decade before marriage, only for the relationship to collapse shortly after.

According to her, communication breakdown, emotional distance, financial stress, lack of appreciation, and the absence of mutual effort often become silent cracks within a marriage.

“When couples stop communicating, stop appreciating each other, and stop emotionally connecting, that is where problems slowly begin,” she said.

She added that marriages require continuous effort from both partners, especially after children, careers, and responsibilities begin taking over daily life.

Despite handling emotionally difficult cases regularly, Revathi admitted that child custody matters remain among the most emotionally draining parts of her profession.

She revealed that during her pregnancy, she temporarily stopped handling custody disputes because the emotional stress from cases involving children became too overwhelming.

According to her, some divorce cases can be resolved within months, while highly contested disputes involving adultery, custody battles, and financial claims may continue for several years in court.

Revathi also highlighted that many individuals involved in affairs are often unaware of the legal consequences they may face once their names are included in divorce petitions.

She stressed that adultery-related claims are not merely emotional disputes but can carry legal and financial implications under Malaysian civil law.

Beyond legal advice, Revathi believes society should place greater emphasis on emotional maturity, communication, accountability, and respect within relationships.

“If a marriage is no longer healthy, there are proper legal and respectful ways to move forward. But involving third parties while remaining in a marriage only creates deeper pain for everyone involved,” she shared. 

Image Credit : Merel Family Law , Shang & Co.